Flashbelt.

Personally, I enjoyed your keynote at Flashbelt. For me, it was a wonderful way to wind down a day of sessions. I hope I get to hear you speak again.

Thanks for putting these up, it rather confirmed what I had been thinking for the past few days since I read about the FlashBelt presentation on Geek Girls Guide in the article by Courtney.

Initially, I had been infuriated and offended, where I, myself, blogged about it. While, I do believe the your open letter and posting of this will soften the blow, my biggest issue that that is a blow needing softening to begin with.

That’s the problem.

I think the bottom line of the issue isn’t about what you said, or how you said it – it’s about WHERE you said it.

What I find the most interesting about your open letter is where you point out that no one from the conference itself contacted you about your presentation. But I wonder if you considered that perhaps, of those that were offended, you are considered an unapproachable person based on how you presented your subject matter.

Considering that you’ve mostly offended women, try to think like one – why would a woman approach you when you frankly blurted out, something to the effect of, “If you don’t like it, f*** you!” – not very approachable, I would think – even after the fact.

You also said that you have two young daughters and a wife – how do you think they would feel, if unknowingly and against their consent, sat down for a presentation such as yours?

I will not chastise you further than I’m sure you’ve already been, nor do I send ill wishes your way, as I’m sure many other have (a little thing called karma) — but I will give you an smidgen of advice from 1) a woman and 2) a public relations (as you have quite the ‘image’ right now) standpoint: learn from your mistakes and move on.

Bad things happen and mistakes are common – we are all human. But we are not cave people anymore.

There is a time and place for everything: what you may find acceptable isn’t acceptable to others; what you may find as pushing the limits, could be taken as crossing the limits.

Take it or leave it – but consider your entire audience in the future, not just the ones who share your gender and your sense of humor.

Some food for thought – The internet is a big place, and, as I am sure you are now brutally aware, social media outlets are as forgiving (or not) as the speed of information thrown across them.

I’m outraged that some people are taking offense to your keynote. It was a great reminder that everyone needs to unwind a little and remember we are in the business of making things fun and memorable (which you obviously did). We are all adults and if some can’t handle very minor adult content then maybe some should consider a job at the church.

Erin, the image you are talking about is a photo of me standing in front of an art installation in the public entrance of a restaurant in Holland. It is not the only image of a woman in my presentation as the following slide features a fully clothed lady enjoying a painting of a nude lady in the NYC MOMA. Do you find it offensive too?

I’m sorry, you’re right. There is a shot of the back of random woman’s head– how silly of me.

I see now you have a friend waving the “art” flag- great!

Now it’s all better.

You prude Americans! With your nipple censoring, sex avoiding and over protective “culture”. It won’t be long before you’ll be needing to lock yourself up in a plain coloured room not talking, not looking and not interacting with each other. Lighten up. Geesh!

@Amy I agree that people should be respectful of others boundaries; however most of the verbal, outraged commentary is coming from people who were not present at flashbelt.

The amount of outrage is disproportionately high for the offense.

Yes, Hoss was a little risque, and yes some of his material was offensive to some people, however, the people who were personally offended by his keynote, had an opportunity to discuss it with him, and choose not to.

I think that behavior is ridiculous. If people are offended by something they need to start being more vocal and direct.

@Amy Shropshire – on the same note, it would be nice to let the people who offended you know that they offended you with “respect” and “understanding”. I was not at Flashbelt, but have read most of the reactions on blogs and Twitter and it seems to me that Hoss has been treated in the exact same way that you feel @Gareth’s comment above is treating you. The email from Courtney Remes completely misrepresents the presentation and Hoss as a person. Like I said, I did not attend Flashbelt and did not experience Hoss’s presentation live. In fact, the first account I read of the experience was the Geek Girls blog post that attached Ms. Remes’s email. I was outraged by Hoss’s presentation as Ms. Remes’s email painted the picture of Hoss as a crude, rude, obnoxious, xxx-rate jerk of a person. Not only that, but she calls out people from the crowd that she doesn’t even know by citing their tweet’s in her email. C’mon, Ms. Remes’s, a tweet is <= 140 characters, can you really infer the meaning or intent of what those individuals were saying through their tweets? In fact, when I read the first tweet she cited, I read it in a complete different way than she understood it’s meaning. I’m glad I held in my judgement of Hoss and his presentation until I gathered all of the facts and experienced the material for myself. It is much less vulgar than has been portrayed. The misrepresntations Ms. Remes’s email make, and the blog posts and tweets that were generated as a result, do not at all treat Hoss with any “respect”. I’m sure Hoss found most of what was said about him to be offensive (some of it was downright dirty, mean, and uncalled-for; a few of the posts in this thread are prime examples). Most of those reactions came from individuals who did not experience the presentation first hand, from people who only had Ms. Remes’s email off of which to base their reactions. That is not at all “respectful” and “understanding”.

@Erin – Have you gotten in touch with Club 11 in Amsterdam and asked them to remove the facade of their club? Have you yet called the NYC MOMA and asked them to remove all “art” that shows nudity? Maybe you can get in touch with the city of Florence and have them take down the statue of David because it portrays a nude male.

It’s too bad your presentation pissed so many people off. I personally would’ve avoid your opening image — it’s too risky of a move for a presentation here in America. It was only a matter of time before it sparked something like this.

for fuck’s sake, hoss’s presentation was great. getting upset over his slide of the woman’s crotch is fucking ridiculous, it’s a picture of an entrance to a fucking bar!

Um, why would somebody speak to Hoss about finding his presentation offensive after he has already addressed that by say – pardon the paraphrase – if you’re offended, f- off?

If a club in Amsterdam chooses to portray nudity, that is up to the local norms to accept or challenge. If a museum chooses to present nude art, again, that is up to museum-goers to accept or reject. If a deeply-religious person, a sexually frustrated male, a female reeling from sexism in the professional sphere, or any other individual objects to the use of sexually suggestive images portraying women in a particular light in a professional environment – that occurs in a completely different social norm context.

If a gay man did that presentation – using objectified sexual images of men – a lot of men would be objecting. You don’t even know why, it just makes your skin crawl. If a woman did that with objectified men, most of you would be uncomfortable but try to be “cool” about it. Yet you would feel like the presentation was a sandwich board “straight men aren’t welcome here!” or “only male gigolos are welcome here!” If my 90-year-old grandfather did that presentation, using a picture of his 90-year-old wife, most people wouldn’t want to see those images. It’s not prudishness, it’s normal professional boundaries. I am a danged sexy women, but on the job, I am merely a danged talented professional. We don’t want all that sexuality in the workplace. First it’s playmate-quality photos, then it’s the janitor’s obese wife, then all standards go to heck. If sexy women are okay, then my gay friend’s erotic art collection deserves a prominent spot in any presentation – he likes big, hairy, older guys, and he’s into some really kinky stuff. Personally, I find the wrinkly, saggy old dudes covered in – ugh, I can’t even say – gross, but if it’s prudish not to want to see other people’s sexual fantasies, then, well, Ricky has some terrific pictures for next year’s conference.

Misogyny, as defined by Merriam Webster, is “a hatred of women”. Offensive? Probably to some. Innapropriate? Most likely. Juvenile? For sure. But misogynistic? I’m pretty sure Hoss doesn’t have a hatred of women.

@Jennifer. I am deeply offended by your hurtful, and completely unfounded accusations of me having anything to do with prostitution. Those are serious accusations, and I thought long and hard about whether to simply delete your comment. Instead I have decided to let the world read your bitter and twisted words to demonstrate that the extremities of both sides of this debate can be as harmful as each other.

By doing a look up on your I.P. address, which is 92.233.190.234, I see your ISP is Telewest Broadband, placing you in the UK, and making you subject to the UK Defamation Act 1996. I have reported this abuse to Telewest who are obliged in cases like this of providing the law with your name and address and confirmation that you used this I.P. address at the time the comment was posted.

I didn’t go to Flashbelt. I’m just reading the aftermath. It is not that there is a crotch-shot of a woman with drink me underwear in existence (hell there are plenty of those)– it’s that it was used at a professional conference that had zero relationship to the lingerie or porn industry. But probably what is even more disturbing than that is the number of people who don’t seem to see that it was inappropriate in this venue. I have studied computer science. Out of every hundred students you might see one female. It is extremely uncomfortable when you’re placed in a situation where you’re trying to further your career, learn new things, etc. in a room full of guys while the presenter is showing a crotch shot of an objectified woman who doesn’t even have a head. All anyone is asking for is a little consideration. I’m betting you could have made the same points with a different picture.

You are so painful to listen to. And really, blaming vicodin? Are you a 12 year old girl? Grow a pair.

Taking out your frustrations on Jennifer is not cool, I thought you would be someone open to free thought and just battle back with a defending response. Tattling on her just puts you on their robot-conservative side.

Here is my proposal to make everyone neutral:
At any type of event, people are handed an encrypted buzzer with “yay” or “neigh” buttons on them. If at any point someone on stage has a disapproval rating of 51% ..their mic is turned off.

This looks like its the same presentation from Flash on Tap, and no one there seemed to have a problem with it. Maybe it’s that no pussies showed up to Flash on Tap.

You’re one of those people that have problems thinking before speaking aren’t you?

If you want to be risque, then you will insult people. I myself would like to see more women in the IT industry, so just don’t insult women, is it really that hard?

There are so many other demographics you could insult, how about insulting those ignorant idiot child-men who think that because they label something as a joke, no one has a right to get pissed off?

I’ve seen Hoss twice and in no way did I find it offensive. It was a bunch of laughs and I hope to see him again in the future. Now I’ve written and then deleted text for 10 minutes now and I will leave it as it is. At the current state of the disussion I expect anything to be misinterpreted. Seems to be a clash of cultures. Sad.

I didn’t attend but what I’ve seen of it didn’t offend me and I don’t get the leap from certain images to assertions of misogyny. I wouldn’t have complained, but if I was going to critique it, I’d say the parts that fell short for me did so because at times the presentation seemed directed to men specifically. As a woman, I found those portions purely unrelatable and I would have thought that either Hoss didn’t expect me, as a woman, to be present or he didn’t feel inspired — for whatever reason — to create a presentation that could include me in on the fun too. I’m all for pushing the envelop and am fine with risque content but I think you can do it in a way that doesn’t draw lines among those in attendance. Not that you can account for every group in attendance, but it doesn’t seem wholly unreasonable to want a conference presentation to not exclude (at times) a group that accounts for half the population — or at least include a joke or two to serve as a counterpoint so that I could get in on the laughs too. Over all, it looked like a great presentation, though.

i have to say that, having followed this story back to the source from the GeekGirls website, i am truly mystified… THIS is what the whole bruhaha was about? a slide of a woman’s crotch? let’s fucking face it – if a lesbian woman had presented that slide all you crybabies would be applauding her for expressing her sexuality. but as it’s a white male – well off with his head!
i’m not just being flippant either – think about it.
all in all i’m annoyed that i spent 15 minutes of my life for something this banal.